The Chic Republic

8 November
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When I was about nine years old, my now deceased Grandmother explained to me that McDonald's achieved its success by conforming its menu to strict, uniform standards of unvarying high-caliber. I flashback to this scene often, and ponder on how I might integrate this invaluable information into my less than consistent lifestyle.////////////// In 2004 I lived in Copenhagen with a 29 year-old dyslexic Danish man for six months. He was pretty hot, and he often served me pancakes in bed.////////////// In 2005 I lived in a flat in London with 5 Singaporean exchange students. They only addressed me when I was roaring drunk and serenading them at inappropriate hours. Or when I accidentally set off the fire alarm with my long, absurdly hot showers.////////////// One time when I was in Iceland, a 1/2 American and 1/2 Icelandic boy informed me that there is DRAMA in Iceland. I've never doubted his words of wisdom for an instant.////////////// I ran into Amanda Lepore and Sophia Lamar in Manhattan last weekend. They told me that they liked my hair. I'll feel flattered forever.////////////// All of these intricate internet networking mechanisms make me quite paranoid, to speak frankly... and yet, I can't help but become obsessed with them.//////////////